It has been a year now, a year since it all started, the depression, the love, the need to be needed. I should never have fallen in love with him, I strongly believe I will never get over this. That first day after the letter, he winked at me, I thought after all the tears everything might just turn out to be allright, but it wasn't, he just told me to hang on, but that wasn't enough, I was so close to death, so close to leaving everything behind. I was young stupid and foolish, never knowing what I wanted. I never told him that I loved him I was too scared, I told her, she believed me, and listened to me. He just told me that it was over now, it had been too long ago. He thought I forgot, but I never did, I still remember very clearly up till this day, when here now I really wish I could just tell him how much he hurt me. I wish I could go back in time to change the past, change what I said. Anything just to make me be there for a bit longer, anything for me never to have left.
It's unbearable, I miss him so much.
:'(